Today, I anticipate 10 days of blissful non-work ahead. i had no patients this morning, so I came into work late. I did not notify the service chief and he paged me mid morning wanting to know where I was... nailed!
I was dutifully humble and contrite. He bought it. I keep my job. Praise God!
I sometimes wish I could squeeze my head like a zit and smear the extruded contents on some fantastic sort of GUI screen or scanner and have my thoughts and emotions appear in an eloquent profound world changing form. Instead,this is what comes out. This and a little bit of pus.
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I am almost alone in the clinic this Friday before Christmas. As I was reaching for my coat to leave I (naturally) get paged to see an old WWII POW who has a decubitus foot wound -- no big deal, usual crappy timing... The gentleman is unable to get out of his wheelchair, so I must get on the floor to treat him. He has dementia, and is not able to give me much helpful information about himself. He has momentary spells of lucency however... but is otherwise hunched over and quiet. When he does speak he is gentle and kind.
I look into his eyes and it's like looking into a mirror. I read the same fixed expressions of wonder and abandonment to ones situation. I see a remnant of a played-out playful spirit. He and I are both reticent ... and I see a look in his eyes that he recognises something familiar in mine. It's like were both looking at ourselves. In me he sees himself as a younger man, and in him, I see myself as an older man. Neither one of us understands anything.
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